Week One: Day Five
The Story
Anna, in her early life, grew up with a loving mother and father who were always careful to encourage and never belittle her. They didn’t have a lot of money, but they made up the difference of expensive vacations with family experiences around town. This changed dramatically, though, when Anna was thirteen.
Matt had a very successful family where both of his parents worked. They attended church, but their faith-lives were Sunday-only church lives. It was not that they were bad people on Monday, it was simply that Jesus was kept in God-box meant for church on Sundays.
One day Matt was feeling overly emotional and he could not figure out why. He had stepped on the scale that morning to see that he had packed on some weight. As a man, he was unaware of this fact until that day, even though he had been clearly overweight for quite some time.
In the midst of this realization, he began to think of the moments in his life when food and feeling fat had been overwhelming. Immediately upon thinking about it, he remembered the moment that his dad had seen him wearing some shorts that were a bit tight. Not meaning any harm, his dad jokingly told Matt that he was part of an obese family. Matt’s other sisters and one brother had also put on some weight. That moment had stuck with Matt, even bringing it into his adult life. He knew that it was time to lose the weight.
Anna didn’t have any overweight issues. She was constantly exercising and knew about healthy eating practices which she implemented routinely. She did, however, deal constantly with self-image issues. Anna remembered the day her parents were arguing and when it all came to a head. She recalled her dad telling her mom that Anna was never able to finish anything. He said that Anna was such a perfectionist that she would never amount to much more than an hourly worker if she couldn’t push though. Her dad was unaware that Anna had overheard this conversation and to this day, he does not know about her hurt. Anna’s mom and dad had been fighting a lot at that point and this conversation, and one other, had broken the camel’s back. They were going to file for divorce. Anna was thirteen, an only child and heartbroken.
Both Matt and Anna found themselves in a place of needing to forgive their fathers and resist the feelings of rejection. Each of them were wounded by simple, yet lasting words carelessly tossed about.
The Devotion
Just about everyone knows the saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. Few things could be further from the truth. This phrase first appeared in the mid-1800s. While it was certainly meant to thwart those who retaliate verbal abuse with physical abuse, it has been twisted to mean that words can have no lasting effect on your life. This is not true in the least as we shall see.
“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” [Proverbs 18:21]. How many of us could take five minutes and build a list of ten things that our closest loved ones have said to us at critical moments in our lives that have wounded us? I imagine each one of us could do this. Even though we may not have intentionally catalogued these interactions, they still exist within our memories. That being so, words have more power than the old saying would lead us to believe. It is true that sticks and stones can break your bones. Look at the story of David and Goliath. Equally so, however, is how words can wound the spirit. What is also true is that words can bring about abundant life.
“If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” [Romans 10:9]. The first action in this Romans verse says that we must speak aloud that “Jesus is Lord”. The very action of using our words grants us eternal life. It is a requirement. There must be no doubt that there is great power in these words!
“But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” [Matthew 6:15]. Conversely, were we not to use our words to forgive others, Jesus tells us that our own sins cannot be forgiven. With our very words, we must forgive others. A confession like this also grants eternal life.
As we can see, our words make a difference. They can build someone up and in the very next breath break someone down. In the past, I have belittled a friend in a joke for the sake of the joke. In every case of doing this, I wounded. Getting rid of this type of humor is essential. Also, being critical of others is detrimental, especially if you verbalize that criticism every chance you get. Unless someone asks you for your opinion, it is always better to look for positive things to say rather than remaining focused on the negative. It takes more effort to do that but we are people striving to be like Jesus.
Sarcasm is a controversial topic. God even uses sarcasm in the Bible from time to time. Importantly, he knows how to do so without being malicious. He also knows how to show anger without sinning. He is God and we are not. There are far more times when Jesus was intently compassionate. We would be better to imitate that. It is much safer.
I challenge you today to make every word that comes out of your mouth subject to the love of Christ. If you sense that Christ would not say it, then do your best to not say it as well. In every opportunity, encourage. May your words have life today and not death. I hope we never again say that words have no power. Let’s be children of great purpose. Let our words speak life!
The Bible
Proverbs 18 | Matthew 6 | Psalm 19
The Prayer
“Lord Jesus, I thank You that You have given us power over our tongues. Not one word that someone utters against me has any power because You offer me the opportunity to forgive them. I hold nothing back. I forgive ______________. I will not withhold forgiveness from them for any reason. I bless them. Please help me to guard the words of my mouth so that they are acceptable in your sight. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
